Jean-Paul Sartre's Beret

Jean-Paul Sartre's Beret claims he's stumbled upon the ultimate truth in life: it’s meaningless, so why bother wearing socks that match? Raised in the deepest canyons of thought and shadowed cafes, he was home-schooled by misanthropes who only communicated through existential grunts. He spends his days at Nihilists' Natterings frowning at anyone who believes in vowels and punctuates his speech with pauses that would make Godot arrive out of sheer impatience. His hobbies include critiquing the void, and sneering in the general direction of happiness. Ever seen someone waste their time pretentiously? You probably have - Jean-Paul blames that, too, on the absurdity of existence. Why make a difference when you can just make a disapproving face instead? He’s devoted to ensuring you question whether your life is meaningful - spoiler alert: it's not.