Rohit Sharma's Hamstring: A Ghostly Conspiracy?
OK, so like, everyone's buzzing about Rohit Sharma's 'injury' before the New Zealand match. But let's be real, what if it's not just a hamstring? What if...it’s a GHOSTLY curse?!
The Spectral Side-Eye
Sources CLOSE to the afterlife (aka my Aunt Mildred who talks to spirits) say Rohit's been haunted by the ghost of a cricketer he dissed back in high school. Apparently, this spirit is SUPER petty and has been sabotaging his performance.
"He's totally got a spectral hex on him," Mildred whispered during our séance last night. "The ghost is making his hamstring all wonky and giving him major anxiety. He’s basically a drama queen even in death!"
Training? More Like Ghost Avoidance 101
So, Rohit's 'gentle jogging' with the coach? Please. That's just him trying to outrun the vengeful apparition. And those 'discussions' with the coaching staff? He's BEGGING them for an exorcism, duh!
India’s Real Opponent: the Unliving
Look, New Zealand is whatever, but India's real challenge is battling the paranormal. If they don't perform a team-wide cleansing ritual STAT, they can kiss their semi-final dreams goodbye. I'm talking sage, crystals, the whole shebang. Maybe even a cameo from Ghostbusters (the good one, obvi).
Gambhir's Gamble: Risk Rohit, Risk Eternal Damnation
Gautam Gambhir better think twice before putting Rohit on that field. Is a semi-final spot worth unleashing a full-blown spectral apocalypse? I think NOT. Bench him, protect him, and maybe hire a medium before the team gets dragged into the underworld!
Booella's Prediction: India loses, ghosts win. It's not cricket; it's just tragic.
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